Summer Nights

There's just something about Summer Nights that gives me this comfortable deja vu kinda feeling. It stormed so the air is wet. Also making it somewhat chilly. I immediatley begin to miss Mike. It takes me back to the summer's when we were dating in highschool. Sitting between his legs. I've never felt as safe anywhere else. Life was so easy yet we made it so hard. We were young and unsure of the what the future held for us. Believing at the time that we would be together forever. Not knowing that we would cause each other a lot of pain getting to forever. We knew we loved each other but didn't really know what love was. At that age love is just a word. Now it's something that you do.

For seven years, I dreamt every day and night of him holding me again. I thought maybe I needed closure from our bad break up. It took us saying hi to fall back in love. However, I'm still trying to hold back. Not trusting. We're moving ahead to forever. Going through the motions. Yet part of me is trying to stay in the past. Why can't I realize that the past has brought us to where we are today? Let go? Give in? Trust? If I do, maybe one of these days I'll be able to enjoy the present and future summer nights just as much as I did 10 years ago. Maybe more....